


Dear anyone

by UhmLikeWhet



Category: Carmilla - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Death, F/F, Leukemia, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-31
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2018-03-04 12:01:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3067106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UhmLikeWhet/pseuds/UhmLikeWhet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the near future and Carmilla has something to say.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear anyone

**Author's Note:**

> I suggest listening to 'Meteor Shower" by: Owl City while reading this.

2213

Dear  ~~Laura~~ , ~~afterlife~~ , ~~woodenstake~~ ,                                      

Dear whoever finds this letter, 

Have you ever wondered what life would be like if you hadn't met that one person?

If you haven't, you haven't experienced love.

Or love as I would see it.

Who would have thought? Me. Carmilla Karnstein as the type of girl who would ever fall in love. Let alone with a human. Her name was Laura Hollis. Adorable girl. Nerdy girl. Fascinating girl. Naive and provincial. 

I met her in the year 2014 when my bitch of a "mother" made her one of my "Targets". 

Laura wasn't my first love. When you've been around as long as I have you meet a lot of people. The problem with falling for a human is you out live them. Sadly for me. I out lived both of my humans. 

Laura was different from Ell though. Ell was old fashioned, even for the time she was around. 1872... I hadn't even been to a new continent yet. 

Almost a century and half apart. Both times were so different. 

Both women were so different. 

Laura knew me. My secret came out and she excepted me, where as Ell went and hide until mother got to her. 

Laura and I got serious after we finally put an end to my mother. We made love into the night. We shared memories and laughs and cries. She got me. She felt what I felt. When I cried, she cried. When I kissed her, she kissed back. Never hesitated. Even after a fight. She never denied me. She didn't make me feel like a "monster" or a "useless vampire" she made me feel human. She made me feel strong when I was weak. All the vacations and field trips we shared will never leave my mind.

Although this letter is being written way passed her time, I am still just as in love with her now as I was then. I watch her family. Make sure they're all growing strong. Every few decades I go back to that collage where we shared a room for four years. Although it is mostly crumbled rocks and every time I go back I regret my decision to ever leave her. But something was coming and I didn't want her around to see it.

I told Laura my goodbyes, told her I might not come back. That was our last night together. But it had to be done.

I drew it away. It chased for some five odd years or so. When I went back to Laura she had found someone new. She was outside a coffee shop with a tall redhead. I didn't notice who it was until Laura spotted me. They both turned my direction. Danny and Laura, hand in hand. Laura gasped. I ran. That was the last time I saw her. The maturity in her face. The height she had grown. She grew up in those five years. While I had been frozen in time.

Vampires don't cry. It's a sign of weakness. But that night, I cried. And the next day, I cried. And now, Im crying. By the time you read this the tear drops will be soaked into the paper and all that will be left are the crinkled remains of the dried drops.

She asked me that night to turn her, so that we would be together forever. But I couldn't do it. I wanted her to live, to marry, to have kids if she even did so. I didn't want her to become a monster like me. But now I know I was being selfish. I should've respected my love for what she wanted.

Instead I left the next day without word. You're probably wondering what it was that was chasing me. Well it's not important. That beast died years ago and soon after so did my love. 

Laura was diagnosed with leukemia at the age of 28. When I got word of what had happened to her I tried to visit. Tried to apologize. Tried to make things right by changing her. But I was too late. Danny sat outside of the hospital crying. Flowers in one hand, a ring in the other. 

That's when I knew.

My one true, true love. My one partner. My one soul mate, was dead.

So here we go. Dear reader. This is my farewell to you. I've lived long enough. Seen the world and every dark corner of it. This is my suicide letter. It's taken me long enough to write. 

This one is for you, buttercup.

                                                                        ** _Carmilla Karnstein_**   ** _  
_**

 


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